The Waiting Game
Waiting is probably one of the worst situations to be in-at least it is for me. I am not a fan of waiting around. I start to feel restless, bored, or angry. I want to jump up and do something, take charge. Otherwise, I’ve got no control over myself or my life, and that makes me feel panic, which usually leads to anxiety. This entire process can occur in as little as 10 minutes and bam, there I am, filled to the brim with anxiety.
The first thing you have to realize is, you’re not in control. Not what you wanted to hear? Neither did I. Life has a mind of its own. It never turns out the way you’d expect it to no matter how much you organize, prepare, or plan. There are some things that will always be out of your hands, like the future. A lot of being human is waiting in the dark, waiting for the light at the end of the tunnel, for that dream or hope to come true. Am I saying it’s bad to plan? No, planning is a good way of organizing your thoughts and having a guideline for how you want to live your life. I’m saying don’t depend completely on the idea of your plan and then feel devastated when it doesn’t turn out the way you expected. I’m saying, you can’t be in control of everything and once you accept that, you can take charge of the things that are within your power to control. Which brings me back to the topic of waiting.
I believe that God has a plan for my life and a purpose for me. Now does that mean I simply sit still and wait around because I feel that I’m already taken care of? No, that would be stupid, and mostly lazy. You can’t get anywhere if you’re not moving, specifically moving forward. It just means that I’ve already taken care of the things I am able to physically control and the rest I just have to let be, and trust that what is meant for me will be and what is not will not. Now whether you believe that God has a plan for your life or not, you cannot simply spend your time anxious, upset, or fearful of what the future will bring. That’s no way to live, although unfortunately it is how many of us do. One thing I like to ask myself when I am feeling stressed, is whether that stress is going to improve my situation in any way? The answer is no, it usually just makes it worse, which makes me realize that stressing about a situation when you’ve already given it your all is pointless. Luke 12:25 says, “And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to the span of his life?” You can’t control the outcome, but you can control your reaction to it. You can choose to be angry and hate everything or be positive and stay hopeful. It’s a decision as small as choosing what kind of attitude you wish to adopt that determines the kind of person you’re going to become and the kind of life you’re going to have. That sounds dramatic but think about it. If you become angry in a situation and remain angry for every coming situation, it becomes a habit, and that habit becomes a personality trait, which then becomes a choice. You are choosing everyday to be an angry, defensive, and negative person, which can ultimately deny you from greater things or blessings that you could have received had you chosen a different perspective. That road leads to a difficult and complicated life because when its you against the world, you rarely succeed when you’ve already given up.
Maybe you’re in a place of waiting right now- waiting on that job to call back, waiting on that text message, waiting to feel good enough, waiting for your life to start, just somehow, stuck waiting. Don’t take your current position in life as a reflection of your worth. Everyone goes through personal highs and lows throughout their lifetime and usually either learns something or takes the long road to hating the world. Every experience is a lesson and with each lesson, we are learning, expanding, growing, and taking one step further into molding the type of person we want to be. Perhaps there is something to be gained in the waiting, something to learn about yourself, something that God is growing inside of you. Perhaps there is something in the understanding that though you are not sure of what comes next, you are enough and there is a God above who will grant you the strength to deal with the outcome if you will only believe that it is so. Opportunity is usually met with opposition. For as many beautiful things you will experience in life, you will also be met with difficult ones, and you can choose to let it break you, or choose to keep trying. If you are in a waiting season in your life, just know that this waiting is building you up for something greater that is to come, that waiting can only occur for so long before it moves into next, into blooming.
I waited all year for the flowers in my backyard to wake up and come back to life, excited to see them bloom in the summer. They did not disappoint, blooming vibrantly and beautifully, their glow transforming the space. They didn’t start that way. They had to be planted, had to be cared for, had to grow, and I had to learn patience in waiting for the final stage. The result is beautiful and goes to show how lovely things can be after the process of waiting, perhaps even lovelier than expected.